Tuesday Talk Time

I made a promise to myself to keep updating the blog. Every few days. Absolutely no less than that. I glanced back through my older posts today. I'm a broken record. Hey guys, bye guys, lost weight, gained weight, I'm starting over, I'm done. The fact that any of you all read this and check in with me is miraculous in and of itself. So, for you all and for me, there will not be another start over. I spend 90% of my day thinking about losing weight and making healthy choices. That is no exaggeration. Imagine what all I could think of if I met my goal and that wasn't a "thing" anymore. Okay don't imagine, because me alone with my thoughts is terrifying. Heh

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What a smart asshole that guy was. After that speech in the movie theatre I wanted to stand up and clap and yell WOOOOOOOO!!! I'm a nerd. But it was Leo playing him. In my defense. So convincing.

But this is so true for me. Tough love. Yes, it's hard. Yes, I'd rather eat a donut cheeseburger with a side of pizza than grilled fish. Yes, I'd rather lay on my couch, eating a box of Reesee's Pieces, cry laughing at all of the Mindy Project episodes than workout. Yes, I secretly wish all skinny girls who eat whatever they want get Regina George tricked into eating high carb candy bars. (I'm satan.) Life, sometimes, isn't fair. But what is fair is I have a wonderful family, boyfriend, animos, job and shelter. And, honestly my health. I'm not missing limbs. My brain functions at a normal rate(debatable) and I have clean water. And yet I sit here and whine about my weight.

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This one is probably the motivational quote of the year for me. As I sit here two years after deciding to "really get serious and do something about my weight." I could've been skinny by now! Think about that. If you genuinely lost weight when you said you were going to, how long would you have been fit and healthy? So sad. So true. But now's the time!

I will never NOT love food. Healthy food, sweet food, grilled food, organic food, fresh food, fried food. I do NOT discriminate. And I probably never ever will.

IMG_3852.PNG *Dana posted this awhile back. I've never felt something as hard as I do that statement. I'm not joking. Stop laughing.

I can't help that I feel happiness sitting at a restaurant with a plate of food in my face. That will never change. I will always get gooey eyes over a piece of cake, tacos, a juicy burger and even roasted zucchini.

This is all a head game. I know I am 110% capable of doing what I need to do. It's not letting my mind slip. It's knowing I can get through this 5 minute craving for ice cream pizza.*

*it's not real. I'm sorry.

So, tonight I take a stand. To get it together. To stop embarassing myself by being a broken record. To have a happy, healthy life.

P.S. Bob Harper's Cardio Conditioning kicks. Serious. Ass. I've done insanity and p90boring and I FEEEEEEEEL bob Harper. I feel you Bob. Every single day after a workout. My butt, my thighs, my arms, my abs. So stoked to have this available to do right inside the house. Plus, he's adorable. Check it out! You won't be sorry. Unless you don't crave that "I worked out really hard" sore feeling. Then it's not for you.

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Xo